


Sam Is Very Protective of His Ass (In Public)

by orphan_account



Series: Angel Wings and Other Things [6]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Humor, M/M, banishing sigils
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-15
Updated: 2013-03-19
Packaged: 2017-11-25 14:46:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/639968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>or, "Gabriel Discovers that Butt Touching in Public is Inappropriate and Will Lead to Your Inevitable Doom" (thanks to tricksterity) or "How Sam Started the Great Prank War of 2013"</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Karilynne](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Karilynne/gifts).



> A prompt by my friend Kari from the sp8cult on tumblr.

It should have occurred sooner to Sam that Gabriel is an ass-man. He’s constantly looking for opportunities to sneak in a grope at the most inopportune times.  
Like in public, when they walk to the grocery store, or along the sidewalk downtown, or when they’re gathering information from the local cops.  
It’s actually really annoying because people give Sam funny looks and when he glares at Gabriel, the archangel just grins at him.  
And that’s when Sam gets an idea. He talks to Castiel and, through vague questions, gets the information he needs. His idea will work.

Sam finds it difficult and he has to do it with his back to the mirror, but when it’s completed, he smiles. The four of them are about to go for a walk through the park (Castiel insists upon it) and there will be a lot of people about. It’s a really sunny day.

Dean and Castiel walk behind them. Gabriel has Sam’s hand and his ass is safe for now, but then Gabriel lets go to swat at a fly that’s bothering them. As he brings his hand back down, he surreptitiously reaches behind Sam and gives him a firm swat.  
And promptly disappears.  
“Dude, what the hell!” Dean yells from behind them and Sam turns and smirks. Castiel is staring at the empty space where Gabriel was and realization dawns upon him.  
" _This_ is why you wanted to know if banishing sigils worked through cloth?" he asks almost disbelievingly.  
Sam shrugs. Too bad he doesn’t know that he’s just started a Prank War that will ravage their household for the next three weeks.


	2. Every Time You Look at Me, You'll Go Blind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel's a big fan of dancing and Hootie and the Blowfish. Sam isn't as enthusiastic. Prank War 2013 shenanigans ensue.

Sam can't figure out why Gabriel likes Hootie and the Blowfish so much.   
"Come on, Sammich, dance with me!" the archangel will say, and Sam will just roll his eyes and go back to sweeping the kitchen floor. Gabriel runs through and slides half the length of it in his socks.   
"What are you, 12?" Sam asks, but smiles nonetheless.   
Gabriel smirks at him but doesn't respond.   
Sam glances over at him as he walks down the hallway to put away the broom and suddenly he can't see. Anything. At all. It comes on so suddenly that he thinks perhaps he got a head rush from standing up too quickly after gathering everything into the dustpan, but when he turns and runs smack into a wall, he realizes something has gone awry. He blinks a few times and his vision returns. 

The next time Sam's vision mysteriously disappears, he's barbequing with Dean.   
"Go get the sauce wouldja, Sammy?" Dean asks. Sam obliges.  
When he opens the door, his ears are assaulted with Hootie's "Time" and his eyes are greeted with Gabriel pretending he's a rock star in the living room. Complete with air guitar. Or invisible real guitar, he can never really tell with him. 

"Dance with me, Sam!" Gabriel calls to him as Sam is bent over and looking through the fridge for the barbeque sauce. He tries his best to ignore Gabriel, he really does, but he can't help but sneak a peek and smile.  
And then his vision promptly blacks out. He bumps into the edge of the counter and falls over.  
The song changes to "I Go Blind" and suddenly everything makes sense. 

"Dammit, Gabriel!" Sam yells, and all he hears is Gabriel chuckling over the sound of the damned overly-catchy tune.


End file.
